Sunday 10 January 2016

There has been an Awakening


Mauna Loa, a desolate and windswept volcanic island located deep within the Pacific ocean. This is the mountain stronghold housing the last remnants of the climate science cabal. Beneath it's smoking slopes exists a vast labyrinth of laboratories, housing monolithic computers upon which an army of climate scientists endlessly toil, committing various arcane and blasphemous adjustments to raw data in a desperate bid to topple the global economy.
For over a decade the island has been relatively quiet, smoking ever so slightly. This era of peace was known as the Pause. But now rumor grows of a shadow in the Pacific. I fear a great El Nino may have stirred the island a little too much and woken up those who dwell within, driving them to fiddle data as never before.
Evidence, if you need it
I came to this realization last Thursday around lunchtime, as I was checking over some dusty old excel spreadsheets. I was horrified to find various climate records had turned alarming.

The above chart purports to show the annual increase of CO2 as measured at Mauna Loa itself. Whether carbon dioxide even exists at all is of course debatable, atoms being nothing more than a theory, but for the data to display 2015 as having the largest annual CO2 increase on record is unacceptably alarmist.

Above: Records of sea level and ocean heat also show recent highs. An observer untrained in the ways of blog science might even make the mistake of thinking the pause never happened.
A possible solution to the madness
I have theorized that if we could somehow bring the 1988 testimony of James Hansen to the volcanic peak of Mauna Loa and drop it into the fiery bowels of the infernal mountain itself, we would finally end the reign of Al Gore for good. It would be an arduous and perilous quest for some brave blog scientists, for Mauna Loa is said to be circled by predator drones controlled by the all seeing eye of Obama. Even more dangerous however is the corrupting nature of logic and facts. The person we send would have to carefully chosen, someone who possesses an inate immunity to reason. I would volunteer to do this myself, but I have been drinking a lot of wine lately and plan to drink quite a bit more.

35 comments:

  1. Welcome back! You are sorely needed: the forces of water-melonistic world dominion have grown stronger in your absence.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I echo Lars' sentiments. Welcome back :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Whether carbon dioxide even exists at all is of course debatable, atoms being nothing more than a theory

    Of course CO2 exists, but it all comes from volcanoes as the above picture proves, and the global temperature increase is obviously from all that hot lava. So keep pumping out that C.. er I mean plant food.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Endorphin Monkey11 January 2016 at 04:56

    Mauna Loa may not actually be the secret hideout of the Global Climate Star Chamber. It is more likely an ersatz deception, much like Area 51 is a “Potemkin Village” type operation to draw public attention away from Area 52, where the REAL federal government secrets are frozen in vats of liquid sarcasium.

    The real hideout of the all-knowing all-seeing climate tentacle hydra is likely to be in a large cosmopolitan city with good international airline connections to the rest of the world, in a non-descript office building near excellent fine dining. At the door of this unassuming edifice will be a brass plate that has “Institute of Responsible Socio-Economic Governance (Enforcement Division)” etched on it. I do not know this building, this city, or the nearest Sushi/Sashimi restaurant to it. But that does not matter. Our own weapons are blogs and loud family arguments, and we are everywhere.

    ReplyDelete
  5. with so much plant food, this summer I'm gonna grow some tomatoes ... this big! Thanks, Mauna. Thanks, Loa.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Warmists are always fixated on either absolute values or, just as insidious, anomalies. We can easily debunk all this nonsense by simply looking at detrended data.

    Just about every one of these supposedly alarming charts ends up being completely innocuous - and I'm not suggesting you get your children inoculated - if we detrend them. Don't worry - DETREND!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Glad you are back Inferno, the greatest blog scientist ever. Lives! Wine is good.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Ignoramus describes you. Mouthing off just to hear your stupid self speak.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And your reason for responding?...

      Delete
    2. Oh give it up Al: none of that evidence of yours counts for anything now its been pointed out you are fat.

      Delete
  9. That volcano is rigged. Mauna Loa is a hoax. Volcanos aren't real - the scientists fudged the photos.

    PS Echoing all the above sentiments. You've been missed, sorely. So glad you're back.

    ReplyDelete
  10. So glad to see you back - and on top of your game. Though I'd never have thought otherwise.

    Blog science lives!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ask not what carbon dioxide can do for you, but what you can do for carbon dioxide! And, while you're at it, ask yourself, "What is the connection between El Chapo and the Mauna Loa labrinth?"

    ReplyDelete
  12. Do you realize that you're completely insane?

    I hope you get the psychiatric help that you so clearly need.

    Thanks for giving my colleagues and I such a laugh here with your nonsensical ramblings.

    ReplyDelete
  13. All the old gang is back.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks be to our lucky stars that Steve Goddard and Willard have been filling in for you with sanity such as this is proven to be. .

      Delete
  14. Custom essay writing service is not an easy talk. It is on line prepaid service and is new task.It is really helps for students to book their project service. Assignment and project related information
    Is also available.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Alleluja, Dr Inferno is BACK!! You've been missed badly.

    ReplyDelete
  16. It's smoking slopes?
    El Nino?

    If the orthography of these two randomly-chosen phrases is representative of the intellectual and scientific rigor of this site—and let's be honest, it presumably is—or, let's be honest, lack thereof—then is it much wonder mainstream scientists don't take this blog literally?

    No—au contraire, it's very little indeed.

    Harrumph.

    Until you post a new article, I can honestly promise I will NOT be coming back here, sir.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Welcome back!! Really missed the valuable insights that this blog provides!

    ReplyDelete
  18. I am so much excited after reading your blog. http://123essay.org/get-essay-com-review/ Your blog is very much innovative and much helpful for any industry as well as for person.

    ReplyDelete
  19. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I can see that you will be putting a lots of efforts into your blog. Keep posting the very good work. Some really helpful information in there. Bookmarked. Nice to determine your site. Thanks! sevenedges

    ReplyDelete
  21. These are really a superb ThThese are really a superb showcases here I am glad to have a review of it and feel to roll on its steps for my benefit always
    Thanks for sharing this interesting blog with us. My pleasure to being here on your blog..I wanna come beck here for new post from your site.Spartan Temporary Tattoo,
    Rose Temporary Tattoo,
    Mexican Temporary Tattoo

    ReplyDelete
  22. The re-installment could be speedier, yet in the event that the entrepreneur encounters some interference or deals drop in the business, the installments will drop with it. Cash Advances Chicago

    ReplyDelete
  23. McAfee MTP Retailcard – To Install and Activate McAfee MIS Retailcard Total Protection you always require a 25 digit keycode. So activate product online or call or live chat with Experts.
    mcafee.com/activate |
    office.com/setup |
    McAfee.com/activate |
    office.com/setup |
    www.mcafee.com/activate|
    McAfee Retail Card.

    ReplyDelete
  24. McAfee Retail Card – Install mcafee and activate mcafee retail card online via mcafee.com/activate. If in case you face contact our support services.
    McAfee MIS Retailcard
    |
    McAfee MTP Retailcard |
    www.mcafee.com/activate |
    mcafee.com/activate |

    ReplyDelete
  25. Its like you read my mind! You seem to know so much about this,like you wrote the book in it or something. https://www.printingyourbox.com

    ReplyDelete
  26. putlockerss.pictures As reported by Stanford Medical, It is in fact the ONLY reason women in this country live 10 years longer and weigh on average 19 kilos lighter than us.

    ReplyDelete
  27. read the latest news here with cellinfo

    YTconvertMP3.com is an online tool that converts YouTube videos to MP3 or MP4 format easily, safe & secure and in high quality mp3 files for free.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Mauna Loa, a desolate and windswept volcanic island located deep within the Pacific ocean. This is the mountain stronghold housing the last remnants of the climate science cabal. Beneath it's smoking slopes exists a vast labyrinth of laboratories, housing monolithic computers upon which an army of climate scientists endlessly toil, committing various arcane and blasphemous adjustments to raw data in a desperate bid to topple the global economy. pretty bed sheets , bed quilt cover , sateen sheet set , alkaram bridal bed sheets , slumberdown duvet , vicky razai price , green sofa cover , velvet comforter , single razai cover

    ReplyDelete
  29. As what is good for the gander is good for the goose, why not let good old Ephraim Inoni benefit from this
    very same largesse? His account published a few days ago should pay off his debt without much loss of sleep.
    Hamari Kahani

    ReplyDelete