I regret to inform you that I have withdrawn my support for your continuing role as chairman of the IPCC. Please resign your chairmanship immediately after reading this message. You may take the rest of the day off.
It was thanks to our help that you became chairman of the IPCC in the first place. We've never trusted the IPCC and the previous IPCC chairman, Dr Watson, was one of those so-called "Climate Scientists". So we had him ousted. We certainly didn't want a "scientist" chairing the IPCC - too close to the "science" you see and therefore too dependent on grant money.
No what we needed was someone with industry links who could make money the good old fashioned way. So we picked you, in light of your industrial links and your qualifications in Economics and Railway Engineering (at a time when trains correctly bellowed co2!). To seal the deal, your directorship of an energy and environment research institute made you a relevant candidate for the position.
Remember? No? Perhaps you don't recall how you became chair of the IPCC? It's hard to deny when it's in print in a 2002 NYT article:
Auto manufacturers and oil companies have long seen Dr. Watson as a foe, and their lobbyists have said that Dr. Pachauri, who has worked with industry in the past, was clearly preferable.
If only you had remembered who put you there. Too late. You've overstepped the mark with your continued insistence that human activity is warming the climate. I guess reading too many IPCC reports made you go all "sciencey".
How quick you forgot the industry symposiums on co2-is-life! And you are a railway engineer? What are you doing chairing the IPCC if you are a railway engineer? It should be a climate scientist in charge - no wonder we don't trust the IPCC if it's being chaired by a railway engineer.
And we hear you are a director of an energy and environment research institute? That you have links to industry? I suppose you stand to benefit financially from all this? So you are not only unqualified to head the IPCC, but possibly in the pocket of industry too?! This is a scandal! How can the IPCC be so corrupt?
Then to top it off I just heard you wrote a book?!
Just stop. Stop now. Last month I believed in manmade global warming. I trusted science. I thought climate science was the best. But thanks to your activities I no longer trust the IPCC or climate science. I can only hope in a very sincere way that somehow the good name of science will survive.
With a tear in my eye,
Chief Climate Scientist and Chairman of the DenialDepot Climate Science Blog
P.S. don't steal the pens when you leave